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Among the Americans I know, there is a strong dislike for the idea that Harry has distanced himself from his family. According to reports, he no longer speaks to them and doesn't communicate with his brother Prince William. Additionally, Harry has never met Meghan Markle's father. This all seems quite odd and has given rise to numerous questions.
Is Meghan ashamed of her dad? Why hasn't Harry taken the time to meet his wife's father? This kind of family distancing strikes many as very isolating and strange. It stands in stark contrast to the family unity that William and Kate have been showcasing in their recent videos and public appearances. Certainly a significant birthday like turning 40 should be celebrated with one's closest family members.
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While it's possible that some members of Meghan's extended Spencer family might attend Harry's celebrations, I doubt he reaches out to reconnect with them. As I've mentioned before, Sarah and Jane - Harry's aunts - were known for their distinctive red hair in their younger days. This speaks to the strong Spencer genes that are prominent in that family.
Thinking back to when Harry attended his uncle Charles Spencer's funeral, he was surrounded by his Spencer relatives. Lady Jane Spencer, Charles' widow, was there along with Diana's sister Lady Sarah McCorquodale. Earl Charles Spencer, Diana's brother, was also in attendance. After the funeral, Harry stayed at Althorp, the Spencer ancestral home.
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If reports of Harry being estranged from the royal family are indeed true, could the Spencers hold the key to reconnecting him to his roots in the UK? I believe they could play an important role. Harry has always spoken fondly of how close he was with his Aunts Sarah and Jane. He also seems to have had a good relationship with his Uncle Charles Spencer.
Harry has frequently visited Althorp over the years, such as for the anniversary of Diana's death. She is buried on the estate, and Harry often tries to visit her grave around her birthday each year. The Spencers appear to be making significant efforts to include Harry in family events and gatherings.
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While Harry's Spencer cousins are no longer children, he has grown close to them over the years. Given your expertise researching the Spencer family and Princess Diana, do you think the royal family might feel uneasy about Harry developing a closer relationship with Earl Spencer specifically? We all remember the now famous line from Earl Spencer's eulogy at Diana's funeral, where he said the Spencer family would watch over William and Harry.
Could a stronger bond between Harry and the Spencers potentially lead to more tension with the royal family? That's a valid point. King Charles and Earl Spencer never saw eye to eye, even having a major public falling out over the funeral arrangements for Diana. Earl Spencer is quite an intelligent man but also complex, as evidenced by his three marriages.
While he maintains Althorp very well and was enjoyable to interact with when I met him, Diana did have a falling out with her brother toward the end of her life. She wanted a house on the Althorp estate but Earl Spencer refused her request due to not wanting the publicity and complications. This deeply hurt Diana and caused a rift between them for a time.
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Of course, Diana's memory remains hugely significant for Harry even today. He frequently references his late mother, especially when promoting causes around mental health issues. Speaking of Diana, I recently read your latest book on the royal family and found it to provide tremendous new insights. You spent a great deal of time researching Princess Diana specifically. Did she ever discuss Prince Harry with you directly?
As Diana passed away when Harry was still quite young, at age 12, she did not often mention him in our conversations. However, when I was writing a book focused on Prince William and Prince Harry in the years following her death, Diana opened up more about her sons. Initially she had concerns about William, who showed disinterest in becoming King from a young age. But later her worries shifted more to Harry.
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While Harry faced difficulties like dyspraxia that complicated school, Diana worked earnestly to support him. Ultimately though, Harry just wanted his mother all to himself at times. He would pretend to be ill in order to be picked up from school early so they could spend time alone watching TV or snuggling together. Harry was very affectionate and close with his mother. After William returned from his Gap Year, Harry even remarked that William was "nicer now."
The notion that Harry and William were always incredibly close is somewhat misleading according to Diana. They only became truly close after their mother's tragic death, as they were the only two who truly understood each other's deep pain and grief over losing Diana. As children, Harry openly discussed feeling frustrated by William ignoring him at school, particularly at Eton - which is a common behavior among older brothers. Did Diana ever mention this sibling rivalry when speaking with you?
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